GOSSIP FROM THE GIRLFRIEND GATHERINGS

Learning from YOU to empower ME !

Going Places in the 2017 Toyota Highlander

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A call to adventure will always get my attention.  Thus, my connection to the Toyota motto “Let’s Go Places” was immediate when I first heard it.   As a longtime Toyota owner, I was thrilled when I was recently invited to experience one of the new Toyota vehicles for a week.   Since my current (and previous) car is an Avalon, I decided to try an SUV – in particular, the 2017 Toyota Highlander Limited.

 

 

 

 

 

The Adventures

All journeys shared with others are the best.  This one was no exception.   So, I checked my weekend excursion schedule and called up some willing companions – my SisterGirlfriends and my 82-year-old mother.   I told them I would be the designated driver for the weekend and we would experience the Toyota Highlander together.    We had a full weekend planned that required traveling the length and breadth of the city which is no small feat in Houston, Texas.

On Saturday, there was a matinee play at the historic Ensemble Theatre in downtown Houston and an early dinner at Pappas Seafood Restaurant near Bush International Airport.   On Sunday, there was brunch at the Grand Lux Café across from the Galleria and an afternoon coffee at the Starbucks near Mercer Arboretum and Botanic Gardens in Humble, Texas.   I spent a lot of time driving around laughing and chit-chatting with my companions.

We talked a lot about the virtues of the Highlander.     I shared information about the numerous awards – NHTSA 5-Star Safety Award, a Kelly Blue Book Best Buy Finalist, and one of the sixteen cars listed as Best Family Car by Kelly Blue Book – that the Highlander had won.  They all thought it was very impressive.    However, they shared their list of things they loved about their riding experience in the Highlander.

The SisterGirlfriends “We Love It” List

  • There was plenty of “elbow room” with enough space so that we all could ride together to the weekend events.    There was sufficient secure storage for all those things we women carry around for convenience, our bags, shawls, etc.
  • The four captain seats and the bench seating on the third row were very comfortable for all of us since beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes.  One of my friends, who is petite and has a physical disability, was able to ease in/out of the second row with no difficulty.
  • We enjoyed the premium audio with integrated navigation and app suite.   As the driver, I kept the Sirius radio on smooth Jazz while we soared around Houston on the power of the V6 engine.   My front seat companion read the manual and pointed out all of the high-tech features to me.     However, it took a few hours before I could rely on the backup camera display with ease.
  • Everyone commented on the luxury and smooth ride of the Highlander Limited.   They all stated that it felt less like an SUV and more like a sedan with the acceleration speed of a sports car.
  • We all LOVED, LOVED, LOVED the color – Ooh La La Rouge Mica!  It was like riding around in a warm, sexy lipstick!    The color is very feminine.  Now, we are all on the hunt for a clothing item and accessory of the same color.

Overall, it was an exciting and fabulous opportunity to experience the 2017 Toyota Highlander Limited.   It is a strong contender to sway me – a long-time Avalon owner – to try something different at my next Toyota purchase.

Happy Thanksgiving!

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HAPPY THANKSGIVING !

 

Let us be thankful for those experiences this year that made us more loving, taught us humility, enhanced our patience, and granted us peace.

Ditching the Doormat Syndrome

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What If……

  1. You planned a solo vacation to relax after several hectic months in your work and personal life.
  2. In general conversation, you shared this information with an acquaintance.
  3. Within 24 hours, the acquaintance called you up to tell you she had purchased an airline ticket to your destination and plan to share your hotel room.

How would you respond?

  1. Tell the acquaintance that you planned a solo vacation and do not want a hotel roommate.
  2. Allow the acquaintance to infringe on your plans and suffer in silence – wasting your money and your vacation leave to be miserable.

This is an actual situation that a friend shared with me recently.  I begged her to respond with option #1 but she told me she could not do it.    Even though she was clearly upset about it, she could not find the power within herself to voice her feelings to her acquaintance.

As women, we are socialized to be the “compromiser” in our relationships.   Sometimes that balancing act creates a situation where we are perceived as “doormats” by others.   Sometimes we start to believe it, too, and our behavior reflects it.

Some of us find it extremely difficult to say “No” to others.   Some of us value the opinions of others more than our own opinions.  Some of us allow others to disrespect us.    These are all signs of the “doormat” syndrome and the need to establish some boundaries.

Here are some considerations for setting boundaries:

Consider yourself as #1 in your own life.    Adopt my mantra – no one can treat me better than me.

Know yourself.   Identify what is tolerable and intolerable to you in your various relationships.

Go with your feelings.    If you are having negative feelings during an interaction with someone then you should examine those feelings to determine the internal root cause of them.   Be OK with your discovery.

Communicate clearly.   We have varying styles of communication with others in our relationships.  Choose the best method of communication that will clearly state your boundary to others even if it varies by individual.

Beware of compromising to your detriment.   You may experience feelings of guilt, fear of rejection, self-doubt which may lead to contemplating your boundaries.    Don’t succumb to it.

It is OK to feel outraged when someone infringes on you.  It is OK to voice your feelings in those situations.   It is OK to set “healthy” boundaries in your romantic, peer, and familial relationships.   It is OK to love yourself so much that you absolutely refuse to be disrespected.

QUESTION(S)

Have you ever felt like a doormat in a romantic, peer, and/or familial relationship?

Reflections from the SisterGirlfriend MeetUp 2016 in St. Maarten

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The tagline for this blog site is “Learning from YOU to empower ME.” The appropriateness of this tagline became evident during the recent SisterGirlfriend MeetUp 2016. Six women gathered together on the beautiful island of St. Maarten for a week away from their everyday lives. It has been almost 2 months since we returned and I am just now posting about it. I was delayed because I stepped back into my busy life and it became even busier. However, the time I spent rejuvenating on that tropical island helped prepare me. You see, that’s what the trip is primarily all about – rejuvenating and recharging – to step back refreshed into your daily life.
The Resort Experience
My first impression of our resort was not a good one. I must admit that I was disappointed because there was no “WOW” factor when I stepped into the lobby. After I settled in later, I determined the resort was comfortable, clean, and cozy with complete amenities. The food and drinks were good, the overall service was excellent, the nightly entertainment provided good music and great singers, and the other guests were very participative when I invited them all up on the dance floor with me each night.

Sonesta Great Bay Resort

Our beach view was fantastic. If we were in our room, on the patio, by the pool or on the beach, we had a fabulous view of the pristine ocean and green mountains across Great Bay where the cruise ships parked on the pier. On some evenings, we enjoyed good conversation relaxing in front of the large opened windows where we enjoyed the cool breeze and full moon hanging over the ocean.

Morning View -St Maarten Evening View from ResortCarousing Around the Island

We did venture out as a group to enjoy the island. Our first adventure was a history tour of the island. We wanted to learn about this small island and the mixture of the cultures – Natives, Dutch, French and African. We were impressed that the tour guide included so much information about the contributions of the African slaves to the economy and culture of St. Maarten.   The statues of these two women of African descent were impressive.  There is one on the French side of the island that is reminiscent of our great lady in New York Harbor.   The other one on the Dutch side of the island has a missing breast which was her punishment for attempting to escape to freedom on the French side of the island as they abolished slavery first.

St Maarten Statute of Liberty Woman in St Maarten

Our next adventure involved hanging out on the beach. We spent the day on the famous Orient Bay Beach. Since 1994, I wanted to return to this beach and stroll nude across it but that was only a dream. Instead we enjoyed cool drinks served by hot, sexy French guys while we people-watched on the beach. It is nothing like an ice-cold Heineken on the beach. We also enjoyed mouth-watering burgers at the beach side restaurant that hosted our excursion.

Orient Bay Beach

On our last outing, we decided to visit the other Sonesta resort near the airport. Now, this resort had the WOW factor and was a newer resort. It was beautiful but it did not have the fantastic ocean view that we enjoyed at the other resort plus it was too close to the airport with all of the noise of incoming/departing flights.

SisterGirlfriend Discussions
The highlight of the SisterGirlfriend MeetUp is the discussions we have throughout the rejuvenating week. Some of them occur via a planned activity where we choose a topic card and respond to the surprising question on the card. Other times our discussions are impromptu and we flow from one topic to another with the ease of longtime friends even though some of us have just met. We share, we laugh, and sometimes we cry. It is liberating, enlightening and empowering. Whatever happens, it is always in a very caring and healing way. The openness of these moments forges bonds among the group as we listen to one another in a non-judgmental way. We all leave from these discussions enriched and inspired.

St Maarten Tree

Overall, we all enjoyed our time in paradise. The ingredients of sun, moon, ocean, mountains, palm trees, and gentle breezes will always ensure a successful SisterGirlfriend Meetup.

Honoring the Brave in the Land of the Free

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Memorial Day is a holiday that usually marks the beginning of summer for most of us in the United States.   Our children are experiencing the joyous last days of school before the long summer break.   Some of us are traveling for the first vacation of the summer and those that remain home are planning the BBQ cookout.

Take a Moment to Remember

However, in all of our celebrating, let us not forget the reason for the holiday.   Let us take a moment to educate the young people in our families about the significance of this holiday.   Let us remind them of the sacrifices that were made by very brave men and women in order for us to have the freedoms that we enjoy in our country.

In my life, I have been blessed to visit the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in the Arlington Cemetery in Arlington, VA and I have visited the USS Arizona Memorial in Pearl Harbor, HI.   Viewing the many white crosses on the graves in Arlington Cemetery and standing on the sunken wreckage of the USS Arizona which is the final resting place of war heroes were among the most humbling moments of my life.   It made the cost of freedom very real for me.   I think every American should make a pilgrimage to these memorials as well as others across our country as a way to acknowledge the journey of our heroic warriors.

Find a Way to Honor

This year I have found a new way to honor our fallen heroes.   While watching my local news station, they mentioned an organization “Bugles Across America” (http://www.buglesacrossamerica.org) which is a not-for-profit organization that provides live renditions of Taps by a bugler at the final services of veterans.   This organization was founded 16 years ago and now has over 5,000 volunteer buglers.  It is expected that 500,000 veterans will die every year for the next several years so this volunteer service will be helpful to the grieving families.

I have decided to make an annual donation to this organization as an active method to commemorate Memorial Day.   I ask all of you to consider doing the same.

Happy Memorial Day!